Northern Attack's 2009 Summer Writing Contest - Week 3

After the pathetic 6 entries for week 1's prompt, there were 18 entries for week 2. Now that's more like it!

Prompt for week 3: The Flendersons--A Match Made In Heaven. Except For The Divorce.

And my entry:

No Happy Ending

One day during Toby's first year at Saint Charles Borromeo Seminary outside Philly, he and the other seminarians had to picket Phoebe's Pleasure Palace, a brothel masquerading as a massage parlor. Their protest led to a police raid within an hour. Among the arrested was Cathy Zolinski. It was her first day as the receptionist. She was unaware of the illegal activity, but the police didn't believe her. After being released she relocated to Scranton. Toby grew obsessed with her after seeing her in news reports, and he left seminary to follow her back to Scranton. She thought he was cute, they started dating, and they soon married.

Things were going well for the Flendersons until one day they were visited by documentarians wanting to make a documentary about their lives because of their unique histories. The documentarians presented what their research had found, including that Toby was Phoebe's best customer, which was how they assumed the couple met. The planned title for the documentary was "Can Buy Me Love."

Cathy immediately kicked Toby out of the house and filed for divorce. The next day, trying to regain a modicum of control in his life, Toby jetted to Amsterdam to find a suitable replacement so the documentary could still move forward. Lightning did not strike twice.

The documentarians didn't want to start over from scratch, so they changed the subject of their documentary from the defunct Flendersons to the probably soon to be defunct company Toby works for. Dinkin' flicka.

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I'm not positive, but I think this might be the first time I actually waited till Sunday to post my entry. I just wish I had been able to come up with something better. The only other idea I seriously considered was that Toby's ex-wife Cathy was made up, and Sasha was an orphan he adopted at the seminary. It didn't make a lot of sense and probably wouldn't have been very funny, although I did like the opening line I came up with:

Question: Toby, his ex-wife Cathy, an elf, and a fairy run a 5k. Who wins?
Answer: Toby, because the other 3 are mythical creatures.